Good vibes for my belly, please!!
I long-wrestled with whether or not I would share the following bit of news in the blogosphere until I’d weathered and successfully forged through the first 12 weeks or so, but it has been so hard to think of anything else, as my mind is preoccupied every waking moment of every day with the fact that I am currently playing host to a little parasite of the most wondrous kind possible.
The reason I’ve been visiting the doctors for so many tests in the last several weeks is because Monkey and I are pregnant (we’d been trying for close to 2 years!). We were overjoyed and stunned and marveling at the wonders of nature when we learned we were, indeed, pregnant (the day after Monkey’s family went home). We only shared the news with family and a few close friends when we first learned. That’s the protocol, isn’t it? Wait until you hit the 2nd trimester to share with the world? It’s really difficult to keep it all contained. Every burble, every stir, every bout of heartburn and sensitive sniffer syndrome, every minute of my day, I am reminded of this transformation going on within my body. So hard to keep it secret. Especially now.
The reason I’ve been in for so many tests (ultrasounds every week, blood tests galore) is that this pregnancy doesn’t seem to be faring as well as my ob/gyn would like to see (I went to see my doc in Chicago while we were there and I found a great new doc down here in SC this week). It took several weeks of ultrasounds and blood hormone-level monitoring (I’m going in for another blood test tomorrow) to bring them to the conclusion that we most probably will have a miscarriage.
Monkey and I got the straight news from our new doc yesterday (he’s really great; I appreciate the no-hemming-and-hawing approach to what might happen). I think we handled this news well this week. The past 2.5 weeks in Chicago were nerve-wracking and tear-filled. I had been a real mess, crying about everything, worrying about what was going wrong, hating that the ultrasound technicians referred to things as “viability tests.” I understand on my brain’s level that this is their job; it’s all clinical and scientific and matter-of-fact. But while they were nonchalantly throwing phrases like “viability” around, Monkey and I were all the time thinking of this as our child, our big, wonderful, life-changing event. And it was too early for our Chicago ob/gyn to tell us under any certain terms whether we would or would not lose the baby. Yesterday gave our new doc enough biological info for him to surmise that the probability and likelihood of a miscarriage was high.
I’m still hoping against hope and looking at all glasses as half-full. If you wouldn’t mind just sending a few good vibes toward my belly today and hope that my tests tomorrow fare better, I would appreciate it so much.
I promise to bring less somber posts soon. I have a treasure trove of wonderful housewarming goodies that were awaiting Monkey and me on our return to SC that I’ll be posting soon (thank you all; you’re wonderful!!). And that great afternoon with RubberSol and family! I promise to do a writeup fitting for this fabulous family then.
Until then, my belly sends out hopeseeking vibes to you. Take good care!
yardenxanthe said:
Lots of good thoughts and prayers to you! How traumatic.
mommytonoah said:
I’m coming out of lurkdom to wish you well.
So, so many good vibes are coming your way from Canada. I can’t possibly imagine what you and your Monkey are feeling.
Please do take care of one another. Hugs.
jen
telestic_tea said:
Every good vibe I’ve got is being directed your way in my thoughts today…I wish the best for you and monkey, you are such a sweet couple and would make the best of parents. Maybe it’s just your hormones running amuck due to all of the stress of moving, throwing those tests off balance. Keep your chin up, please don’t lose hope.
ani4775 said:
Oh Giao. I am sending you happy and healthy thoughts. Good luck to you and Monkey. The very best of luck to you!!!!
turabiangirl said:
Oh girl, I’m so sorry. I know this is extremely stressful and traumatic and the timing probably makes it even more difficult. I will pray that everything works out and you are at peace.
justjenn13 said:
good thoughts.
RubberSol said:
I am praying for your little bean.Giao, I am so here to support you — I know what it’s like to be preoccupied every second of the day with thoughts of such tests and seemingly thoughtless doctors/technicians etc. Stay strong and stay hopeful.Best to you and David.
Bekmarie said:
I’ll definitely keep you three in my prayers and hope that your little baby will be as strong willed a person as you are and hang on! {{hugs}} Good luck with everything, I know it’s got to be so difficult!
hillarylang said:
All the good vibes we’ve got are headed your way.
lorilyn said:
Oh, I am sending you many positive thoughts and well wishes.
litlthings said:
Sending healthy vibes and positive thoughts your way always!!
ladobra said:
Keep the faith and be positive no matter what.
CreatureBug said:
Tears came to my eyes as I read your post, for what a struggle you must be going through. Sweet Giao, I am thinking moment by moment of you, your hubby, and your little belly. I hope that you are able to find rest in the chaos of moving. Love and hugs to you!
thesoulofhope said:
I will send hope to your belly – all that I can (I am after all, Hope, so it should be lots!) I am so happy you shared this with us – please email me if you need anything!! And keep us posted!!
thesoulofhope said:
P.S. I love the new banner – it is new right or have I been really unobservant – and the belly holding gnomeg – love that too!
meggiecat said:
Dear Giao,
Every prayer and good thought is going your way. Let peace and calm be your mantra so the docs don’t make you crazy.
Best thoughts,
Kathy
blisskitty said:
lots of vibes comin at you!
garlicgirl said:
Giao, I’m sending many good thoughts, hopes & prayers your way. Please do not worry about somber posts. We all care about you & want to be there for you no matter what. My fingers (&toes) are crossed.
Anonymous said:
Sending you good vibes all the way!!! Crossing the west part of Italy… crossing the Atlantic now… oooh waving to the passengers in the commercial airliner that’s making it’s way to europe… almost there! (Well, I guess considering where I’m sending them from…heheheh). Hang in there both of you!!!
bertha79 said:
Oh wow! I am so happy for you and sorry at the same time! Sending lots of good vibes for you and your family….
girlfactor said:
Oh, Giao! I wish that all will turn out well. Many positive thoughts and good vibes to you, Monkey and your li’l growin’ belly. Stay calm and be strong!
boydcreek said:
Hey Giao, I have been wandering about you! Great news for you two! You have my thoughts and prayers!
frecklegirl12 said:
I am glad that you shared what is going on with you- all these hopeful prayers and thoughts have to help!I also am teary reading your post and will be thinking of you and Monkey constantly.HUG! HUG!
Musingsofislandgirl said:
lots of love to you!! I have a picture posted on my site just for you! I had you in mind when I took it đ Hope it makes you laugh. :)xx
helloyvetty said:
Oh, Giao. I’m tearing up just by reading this. I’ve been there and know the feeling of being ecstatic and more scared than I had ever been in my life both at the same time. I’m sending you my good thoughts and prayers. Try to stay positive and calm for your own (and baby’s) good. I know it is easier said than done especially with all the hormone changes you are going through, but otherwise you’ll just drive yourself crazy. The best of luck to you, Monkey and your little Monkey-Gnome.
mipmup said:
definitely sending you, monkey and the baby the best vibes i can muster. hang in there!
soulemama said:
Oh…from the babe in my belly to the babe in yours, I’m sending all the good energy we can. Hang in there. đ
DramaQueenIsMe said:
Big hugs and love being sent your way, Giao! What a tough time you and Monkey must be going through. You are in my thoughts and in my prayers.
la_chica_alta said:
I’m sending you positive vibes. Take care of yourself.
taniahowells said:
Og giao!
my warment and very best vibes ever are being sent your way!
xoxox
tania
WolenZo said:
I’m sending lots and lots of good vibes to the both of you
carrieoke said:
Sending lots of prayers and happy happy thoughts to you, Monkey, and your belly, sweetie. đ
buzzville said:
I’ve been a lurker but had to chime in that all of my best wishes are headed your way. Hang in there and take care of yourself – be as relaxed and mellow as you can!
rozzieland said:
Oh honey, I’m late! I just found your post today. I pray that everything went well today and send you warm hugs and sincere concern and care. ~ http://www.rozzieland.blogs.com
violetismycolor said:
Giao…I am sending mountains of good vibes your way. The whole baby thing can be very nerve-wracking, I know…when I was pregnant with Ross, we had to do an hour-long ultrasound because they were ‘worried’. It totally freaked me out but all turned out well…I’ll be praying hard!
sweetpeakate said:
Giao… I can’t imagine, I send love, support, hugs and positive healthy “kick the ass of the odd’s” vibes. Know that you are in my thoughts and more so in my prayers.
KaneBlues said:
Sending my warmest wishes and good vibes to you.
Love & Aloha~