misc. gnome blather
Big thank yous to all who left more lovely comments and emails and phone calls (I love my aunties!). Monkey and I are now at a point where we’ve accepted what is inevitable (we had the final unltrasound this morning. no further development since our last ultrasound and a very irregular gestational sac), so I’m going in for surgery tomorrow. I am terrified. The idea of anesthesia, poking and prodding and tissue removal from inside my body, having to remember to not eat or drink anything after midnight tonight (Monkey calls this the mogwai syndrome). Seriously, I am really freaked about the going under and getting operated on while I’m ‘asleep.’ bit. And all the preadmission questions about whether I have set up living wills and power of attorney and such. Flipping scary stuff to think about too much.
On the up note, I hope you all know you really did warm my heart and lift my spirits. Infinitely. Although this is definitely a sad and traumatic experience in life, Monkey and I are both fatalists of sorts and truly believe that everything that is supposed to happen in this world does (like us meeting and marrying, despite being born and raised in different corners of the world). It may be some kind of coping mechanism or somesuch, but it really makes living life a lot more bearable for us both. My sweet mom was worried I was falling into a deep depression and daily called every few hours to just check on me. But I’m ok. I’m ok with all of this. When the time is right and the cosmos are in order, I hope and believe that Monkey and I will eventually be blessed with a wonderful brood of little people. I’m disappointed that I won’t be able to join the mommy club with a whole lot of my friends who are expecting around the same time we would’ve been, but everything happens for a reason, right?
Until then, I am looking forward to Lizzie visiting this week (I am so! thrilled she will be here with us in our new little home) and being able to eat the things i’d been craving but abstaining from (feta cheese, sprouts, hot dogs….yummy things good and bad) and being able to walk into a supermarket without wanting to vom for being surrounded by so much food. I am most definitely going to be not-missing the queasies and the hormonal swings and tears (tv’s had me bawling like a fool the last few months). And the swelling.
I still have goodies to post someday soon (wanted to be able to spend proper time on the post). Until then, just would like to share that Crafters for Critters has launched its most recent round. Lots of goodies for you who love to shop. And all for a wonderful cause.
Thank you again for all your support and good vibes and warm thoughts. I hope to be feeling well soon after surgery, but if I don’t get a chance to chime in again this week, I hope you have a wonderful weekend and a reciprocal warm fuzzy from me. Big hugs!
shokufeh said:
I’m so sorry. Good luck with the surgery. Your attitude is inspiring.
DramaQueenIsMe said:
Giao — I’ve been checking your blog everyday all day hoping to hear some news. I am so sorry to hear how things have turned out. I can’t even imagine how diificult it must be. You are in my thoughts and prayers. Big hugs!!!!!!
girlfactor said:
I’m sorry to hear of the outcome. As you said, things happen for a reason. I was in a similar situation myself five years ago and now have a bubbly, full of joie de vivre three year old girl. It is painful. It is terrifying. It is sad. But it is hopeful too. All the best to you and Monkey. Take it easy. **HUGS**
bumblev said:
Dear Giao, I’m so sorry for you both. Tons of love being sent your way from Jim and I both. Surgery is so nerve-racking but I know you’ll come out just fine. Take care of each other!
taniahowells said:
more good vibes coming your way!!!!!tania
la_chica_alta said:
I admire your attitude and candor. Take care of yourself. I’m still sending positive vibes your way!
jesswolf said:
Dearest Giao! Oh boy, you take very good care of yourself. I wish all the luck in the world with your surgery. I would be scared, too. I am sending heartfelt warm and fuzzy vibes to you and David.
With much love and care!
Jess
frecklegirl12 said:
What a special person you are, Giao… blessed with such positive energy especially at such a difficult time.Sending hugs and healing thoughts your way. I will be thinking of you- let us know how you are doing as soon as you are able!
RubberSol said:
Sweet Giao. I am so sorry for everything you’ve gone through the past month or so. I certainly admire you for your strength (and for you candor as someone above mentioned). Take good care of yourself — rest, relax, and recuperate. We’re all thinking of you.
heyshanny said:
I’m so sorry to read that it’s turned out like this. Your attitude is just amazing and inspiring. One day, when the time is right, with an attitude like that you’ll make a wonderful mother. Take care while recovering.
melly311 said:
Oh sweetie, I’m so sorry that it turned out this way but I do so admire your strength and the amazing way you have handled all this. Please take good care of yourself. And I’m sure one day you and D will have a little bunch of monkeys and gnomes running around the house – yikes ! Sending you lots of hugs and good wishes!
Bekmarie said:
You will be a great mother one day, when the time is right. Good luck with the surgery, I’ll continue to keep you in my prayers. {{hugs}}
TheGreatCanadianHo said:
jeezus freekin christ! what the god awful did i miss! i thought not checking in on your blog would be cuz you’re moving…i had no idea. i’m so sorry baby…i wish i could hug you in person. i’m crying for you as i type…but yet i know you’ll be strong, you’ll be okay. i’ve been there, so if you ever need to chat, you know my email. oh shit.
not so many cheers,
lotsa lovin’s
kerry
kenenske said:
You’re in my prayers Giao. We have been waiting for 6 years, but I believe that God will bless us (and you) when the time is right. Just think how much we’ll be able to teach our children about patience and perseverance!
KaneBlues said:
I’m so very sorry for your loss. My mom had a similar experience before I was born, but if she would have gone full term she wouldn’t have had me. I just know that when the time is right, you’re going to make an awesome Mommy.
My thoughts, prayers, and best wishes are with you. Love & Aloha, my friend.
yvestown said:
Giao, I wish you all the best to get through this difficult time and I wish you good luck with the surgery – Eek, I’d be scared too! I’m thinking of you :o)
Anonymous said:
I hope all goes well with the surgery. I’m sorry for your loss. Still, you are a lucky girl to be so loved by your wonderful family and friends.
ani4775 said:
Sending you good wishes for your surgery Giao!!
helloyvetty said:
Giao, sweety, best of luck in your surgery. I know everything will turn out ok and really admire you for your strength. I’m really not one who prays but for whatever it’s worth, I prayed for you. I’m sorry about how all this turned out but I really do think the same as you, everything that is suppossed to happen eventually does. Take care of yourself.
boydcreek said:
Giao I pray all went well for you!!! Hang in there girl!!(((HUGS)))
Musingsofislandgirl said:
Everything will be fine. You are in many of our thoughts. Lots of hugs!
telestic_tea said:
You haven’t lost your sweet and positive spirit, you always have a wonderful perspective on things. I believe in fate strongly too. I just know you and monkey are going to have a beautiful home filled with beautiful children someday soon…I can’t wait to read all about it. lots of love.
WolenZo said:
When you read this the surgery probably is history, I hope all went well. I too lost one after a five month pregnancy, it’s pretty hard and I think even more difficult when it’s your first. So keep up and take care and know you are in our thoughts…
thesoulofhope said:
Oh gosh, here it is already Thursday – and I hope everything went well as it could considering the circumstances. Post soon, so we know how you are.
dishyduds said:
Giao, I am just catching up on this. I am so sorry and will be thinking of you and your family. Love and hugs.
violetismycolor said:
Honey, Honey…This, I know, is so very hard to go through. My very first pregnancy was with twins and I lost them one week apart. I lost the first one and they did an ultrasound and said that they weren’t sure if I would be able to keep the second. Then a week later, I started hemoraghing (I mean, the blood was just pouring out and it was really, really scary). I knew I had lost the baby and then they had to do a D&C and I had to be awake for that. I think it would be better to be asleep. It was horrible and sad and I had a hard time getting over it and wondering if I could have a normal pregnancy. But all got better, and within 5 months I was pregnant with my wonderful Adam, and life was wonderful again. I will pray that you recover from this and after you have felt the loss, you will heal like I did and have a happy, healthy pregnancy when you are ready. xxx000, violetismycolor (Diane)
jesthesweetpea said:
Love ‘ya girl!
Anonymous said:
Sending you some big hugs dear Gnome!!!
stefyau said:
Holding only good thoughts for you ever since I found out. Take care Giao and big hugs.
InnovativeIllustration said:
So sorry to hear of this news, thinking of you guys, Michelle
amyfromgreenwich said:
Love you like its my J-O-B….
Stephanie_in_Heels said:
I am so very sorry for you and Monkey. You will be in my thoughts and prayers.
Shirewoman said:
I am so sorry for you and Monkey. Yes, everything happens for a reason and I have no doubt there’ll soon be a whole swarm vying for your attention. You are brave for sharing this with all of us! We’ll all be thinking of you.
pipstar said:
Giao, just read your news…am so sorry to hear of it. I will be sending you much positive energy and best wishes your way. Take care of yourself.